Looking Through Stained Glass

It’s the Holidays!
It’s the holidays!

Everyone is starting to or at least trying to find the beginnings of their holiday cheer. Visions of green garlands, glowing candles and pretty wrapped presents are again in vogue; a lightness of spirit is filling the air.


It’s just another bland day to me. Just one more gray late autumn eve that’s falls into the vacuum of so many others that have comprised my life thus far.

Just one month to the end of the year. Just one more year near complete. Just one more tool to mark, that I, have yet again, fallen short of that ideal. You know…sugar plum fairies, Santa’s elves….

It’s the holidays!

Uh huh…

It’s much easier to vail to vernacular of holiday hearth and other local comforts than it is to look too deep behind the lightness of the paper mask I wear.

Being complete in heart, in head and in soul is a venture I succeed only in the virtual façade that easily shades the truth from those who don’t know me well enough to know any better. And those who should know better have also become fooled by the velvet shields of the vapid I once again envelop myself with this time of year; as I sing the various songs of the season: Silver bells…Joy to the World…


Even as I consider how the tree will be decorated; even as I take pie orders; even as I ponder the gift list… all the things that make the unbearable lightness of being in this season just that - unbearable. These four walls that should be my comfort and joy –a.k.a. my home – hold no viable comfort at all. Those who reside with me either fall into the lock-step of this intricate dance or choose not dance at all in defiance. For to dance is to acknowledge they alone have set the tune of this dirge.

It’s the holidays!


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© 2006 Raivenne (All rights reserved)

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